Biblical Living, Community, Coronavirus, Family, Lockdown, Prayer

My Lesson from Lockdown – Kassidy


During the month of October each of our four elders are preaching on something (of God) that they learnt during lockdown. A sort of mini preaching series! Off the back of this, we are inviting anyone at Jubilee to contribute their own lesson from lockdown. This doesn’t have to be in this blog format, but could be a poem, a video or some other expression. Sharing what we have learnt about God isn’t limited to our leaders, but everyone has a part to play in bringing something for the encouragement of the Body.

A year after Ben and I met, we decided to start dating. We had liked each other since we first met but we’d put it off, mainly because I lived in the Netherlands and he lived in Guernsey. We were a day’s travel and a couple of hundred pounds away from each other. I had a year left at school and I knew, once I left to go to uni in the UK, seeing Ben would get a whole lot easier.

If I could only finish school, then I could move, then I would be happy.

A year later, I found myself moving into my student accommodation at Warwick. My family felt far away and it both was thrilling and slightly terrifying to be going it alone for the first time. Ben was ill with glandular fever and I found myself thinking about the future of our relationship. I knew I wanted to marry him and I longed for a family in the UK. First, I had to get my degree out the way.

If I could only finish university, then I could get married, then I would be happy.

Second, and also quite importantly, Ben and I would need to be in the same country. The UK made the most sense for both of us, I was tied here for three years and there were more job opportunities for Ben. We began the job hunt. It took months to hear anything back from the many applications. Then months to hear back definitively for the interview Ben had flown over for.

If Ben could only move to the UK, then we could see each other whenever we wanted, then we would be happy.

Starting to see a pattern yet? Fast forward a couple of years and many things, some immensely joyful, some deeply sorrowful, and some in between had happened. Ben had moved to the UK, I was reaching the end of my degree, I had a job starting to line up and we were engaged to be married in September. Things were finally falling into place for my perfect plan.

However, as many of you will have also experienced, COVID-19 decided, quite inconveniently, to ruin everything. There was no way our wedding could go ahead as planned, we weren’t even sure we would be able to get married. We had wanted this for so long, I knew,

If only we could just get married, that was all, then we would be happy.

We made new plans for our wedding, we waited anxiously on the news and restrictions to see if we could go ahead. We started house hunting, found somewhere we loved and, in June, began the process of buying it. A few weeks ago, joined virtually by many of you, we got married and it did make us very happy. But, our house sale had experienced many delays, we still had nowhere to live and we weren’t sure when we would see our families again. We were so relieved to be married but couldn’t help a feeling of unsettlement creeping in. Where was God in all of this?

We moved into an air bnb, watching our phones and checking our email inboxes for the news that the house sale was moving forwards. We were only met with issue after issue.

If only we could have a permanent place to stay, then the uncertainty would end, then we would be happy.

In other times in my life, when I have struggled, God had spoken to me clearly about the situation, what was happening and why. We prayed and prayed and I heard nothing. Why was God letting this happen? Surely he knew this was the last piece in the puzzle, then we would be happy. Then it hit me, this wasn’t the last piece in the puzzle. Life is rocky, there will always be something else that must happen before we be happy. Did I really want to spend the rest of my life looking to the next thing which will make everything perfect?

We, as Christians, are not called to live from one thing to the next to make us happy. We are not meant to find our security or our fulfilment in worldly things. It is not unreasonable to want to know where you’re going to live next week, but this is not the thing which will bring me joy. Ultimately, the only thing which will do all of these things is our constant, complete and perfectly good creator.

A few years ago, I had a picture of running between temporary springs in a desert. They satisfy us for a short while, but they do not solve the lasting problem. We are to find and rest in the oasis, where the water always flows and our thirst is always satisfied.

My lesson from lockdown, which I would like to share with you, is this: The next thing is not the thing which will make you happy. There will always be things which are a bit wonky, a bit out of sync. Life will never be exactly the way we want it to be, at least not permanently. It’s not meant to be. Our home here is temporary, but our eternal home is permanent. True and lasting joy can only come from our Father. If I could only keep my eyes fixed on my Father, then whatever my life circumstances are, I will have everything that I need.


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